I have watched the last 7 years of my life go by; all of the people that I went to high school with have already started on their masters and some of them have even finished and gone out into the world. Me? No, I am in my second year in college technically. I like everyone else went into traditional college when I graduated high school. I went to class and I studied but I also go sidetracked and found other things to do in my spare time. I realize now that I was never ready for school then. I was kicked out in 2006 for academic reasons. I flunked out of English three times and I flunked out of Spanish. It was enough to put me on probation from which I never recovered, but back then I don't think part of me cared.
I think now I realize that we all make mistakes in the past and that it makes the drive even harder. Since I got the letter telling me that my HOPE Scholarship had been taken away, I didn't have much internal hope of ever actually going back to school. How was I going to afford it? That was my biggest hurdle, and it was an internal battle with myself between being back in school and not ever actually going back. Almost a year ago someone told me about Ashford University, and I looked into the programs there and after talking to financial aid, decided to take out federal loans to pay for school.
Somewhere between being kicked out of school and going back to school, God blessed me with a wonderful husband and two fantastic children who are now three and one. They are the center of my world and I couldn't help but think that they wouldn't be around now if I had stayed in school. Not that I don't still regret the mistakes in the past, but we have to move on from them somehow and erase the slate clean.
Currently I have just hit my second year credit wise and I am hoping to keep my straight A streak for as long as I can. I have never been the math person but I feel that if I devote enough of my time to my studying at this point I can do anything. I have realized that it is not about failing or succeeding, it is about trying. If you don't try to the best of your ability you can't succeed. Only giving 50% effort isn't enough. You have to be devoted to the goal and in the end success will follow.
I remember reading a book at the Hugh O'Bryan Youth Leadership conference called It Is Easier To Succeed Than Fail, one of the greatest entrepreneurs of all time, S. Truett Cathy wrote that book and his words of wisdom, I am pretty sure I passed them off at the time I read the book. He was right though it is easier to succeed, you just have to try.